The skies were blue, the sun was shining, and a soft breeze filled the day.

This celebration was at the home of one of Jim’s sisters. A beautiful old Tudor, on a hill, and surrounded by a variety of mature shade trees. As I sat in a beautiful floral-covered chair under one of those stately trees, at short intervals folks were walking up the driveway. Most brought lawn chairs…many brought a dish to pass…lots of ice and coolers, babies and toddlers…and most wore yellow. The driveway and the yard was dotted with bouquets of yellow balloons…you didn’t need the address to find this house. You just looked for yellow.

Yellow was Jim’s favorite color. This gathering of family and friends from near and far, came to celebrate the life that was taken from us on May 31, 2020.

As I sat and listened to the chatter, watched kids laughing and playing made-up games, babies giggling or fussing, the distractions made no difference to anyone. Friends or not…this was a family.

Soon it was time to eat and in short bursts adults and children walked up the brick stairs to the house, got in line, still chatting, and waited for their turn at the amazing buffet that was contributed to by all. On the dining room table was a vase of yellow flowers, a bowl of lemons and yellow peppers, a candy dish with lemon drops, and other treats of yellow. The kids found this treat table in no time at all.

While everyone was enjoying the feast, as with all large gatherings, it got quiet. Soon things picked up again after tummies were full. Children running and laughing, babies cooing, and new small groups of folks starting up new conversations.

Shortly after dinner, there was a gathering in the make-shift theatre to watch a presentation of Jim’s life on a big screen. There were tears before the presentation started. Everyone knew it was time to see a tribute to Jim’s life and we didn’t want to see it on the screen. We wanted Jim there to make us laugh, to tease the kids, to hug loved ones, and to take the pain of this loss away.

What do we take away from an afternoon like this? We take the new stories and jokes we heard that day. We take the new memories we made while recognizing and honoring one hell of a nice guy that is so painfully missed among us.

Jim would have really liked this party…

There are topics that some people prefer not to discuss. Politics, religion and salary to name a few. I’m sure there are more but I was raised to not discuss those three topics with anyone outside of our four walls. Today everything is a free-for-all from slamming our political leaders to coming clean about your thoughts on organized religion…or just simply not being a believer at all. I remember years ago hearing about citizens in other countries being thrown in jail for saying anything negative about their leaders. Nothing would satisfy me more than going on social media and letting everyone know how I feel about certain subjects but I’m not strong enough to handle the backlash. Because of this I keep my mouth shut.

I am still old school about ‘what is said within these walls, stays within these walls’. Today nobody has a filter on their mouth because of ‘freedom of speech’ and the fact that nothing will happen to you personally if you share your views. Except on Facebook. You can go to ‘Facebook Jail’ for saying the wrong thing or posting the wrong type of picture. Hell, if I said everything on my mind, I’m sure I would get a personal call from Mark Zuckerberg offering me a monthly stipend to stay off of all social media…including Facebook.

There is somewhat of a taboo subject that is rarely addressed. Family. Every Mother’s Day and Father’s Day social media is inundated with tributes for having the greatest Mom or Dad on the planet. There is also Sibling’s Day which draws out millions of posts on social media about how much everyone loves their siblings.

It is rare that you see a comment from someone who isn’t actually fond of a certain member of their family. Why? Because of the backlash. That backlash is coming from people who can’t even fathom having a Mom, Dad or sibling that doesn’t deserve a nod on any of the holidays created for family members. If they grew up in a house with parents like ‘John and Olivia Walton’, then so did everybody else.

Out of respect, most family’s keep their mouths shut publicly about a relative that they are stuck with. Since I read the local obituaries several days a week, I get a feel for what kind of person the deceased was…and since every obituary is written by family members, the deceased was nothing short of a gift from God, and if given the chance, they could probably walk on water. There are no scathing obituaries because family’s aren’t going to spend hundreds of dollars to announce that their family member was hated and / or despised. They’re family…you’re stuck with them. While they’re alive, you may have to tolerate them for holiday’s and an occasional family wedding, but now that they’re gone, it’s simply good riddance. Forget the obituary…let’s take that money and go out and celebrate that they’re gone.

I have seen the following obituaries before because they are a novelty. Why? Because someone actually had the balls to speak their mind publicly about the deceased. While these are novelties, people who grew up with ‘John and Olivia Walton’ are appalled by this.

Kathleen D She married Dennis D. in 1957 and had two children, Gina and Jay. Kathleen became pregnant by her husband’s brother, Lyle D., and moved to California. She will not be missed by Gina and Jay, and they understand that this world is a better place without her.  

Dolores A Her family will remember Dolores and amongst ourselves we will remember her in our own way, which were mostly sad and troubling times throughout the years. We may have some fond memories of her and perhaps we will think of those times too. But I truly believe at the end of the day ALL of us will really only miss what we never had, a good and kind mother, grandmother and great-grandmother. I hope she is finally at peace with herself. As for the rest of us left behind, I hope this is the beginning of a time of healing and learning to be a family again.

Leslie Ray C was born in Galveston, Texas on November 20, 1942 and passed away January 30, 2017, which was 29 years longer than expected and much longer than he deserved. Leslie was surprisingly intelligent, however he lacked ambition and motivation to do anything more than being reckless, wasteful, squandering the family savings and fantasizing about get rich quick schemes. Leslie’s hobbies included being abusive to his family, expediting trips to heaven for the beloved family pets and fishing, which he was less skilled with than the previously mentioned. Leslie’s life served no other obvious purpose, he did not contribute to society or serve his community and he possessed no redeeming qualities besides quick witted sarcasm which was amusing during his sober days.

What can we learn and take away from this? We live in a troubling world and society. Be kind. Let someone cut in front of you that appears to be in a hurry. Family’s are made up of all different personalities with likes and dislikes that might not be the same as yours. Every now and then a few feathers get ruffled and when they do, talk it out and put it behind you.

The Durrells.

Let me start by saying that I only like feel-good shows or comedies. I don’t care for any program or movie that involves things blowing up, car chases or bad things happening to good people. I think you get the picture.

I also hope that I learn something from the shows / movies I watch. Here’s a great example. About 25 years ago my cousin asked me to join her in entering the Culinary Challenge at State Fair. I never thought of entering a county fair much less THE State Fair. I’m a reasonably good baker / cook but…I took the challenge.

I wanted to only enter one item to see how the process works and to find out if this is something I would like to do in upcoming years. So many categories to choose from…where do I start.

My pecan pie has always been a hit so I decided to enter that, but what could I do to make it special. Then I remembered an episode of The Walton’s that I watched years before where Grandma entered a pecan pie into the Jefferson County Fair. She added one tablespoon of whiskey to the pie. That was her secret ingredient. What the heck…I had nothing to lose. But I did one better…

I had some honest-to-goodness moonshine from the hills of Tennessee in my possession. I’ll just add one tablespoon of that.

On judging day I dropped my pie off and went to work. It was a couple of weeks later that I received something in the mail from State Fair and it was a blue ribbon. My pie actually took first place.

I guess adding booze to a recipe is something I learned on TV. 😉

So which show am I in love with? It’s currently playing on Amazon Prime and it’s called The Durrells in Corfu. It’s a four-season series, takes place in Corfu Greece, and it’s about a family from England in the mid to late 1930’s who moves to Corfu. And it’s based on a true account of this family journey written through the eyes of the youngest son, Gerry.

Greece holds a special place in my heart. My husband is Greek and we’ve been to Greece three times in the last eleven years and we’re going back in three months. And we’re going back as a big family trip in June of 2022.

I’ve never been to Corfu but enjoyed watching the show and seeing familiar things that probably occur on every island that is a part of Greece.

So what could I possibly have learned from The Durrells? I learned the acceptance and patience from Louisa, the desire to be something great from Larry, the hard exterior and soft interior of Leslie, the dreams of Margo, and the passion and beliefs of Gerry. Most important I watched a love, friendship, and respect grow between Spiro and Louisa.

I finished watching the series for the second time last night and was still excited at the beginning of each episode and still cried at the end because I didn’t like the ending (although it actually happened) and because I didn’t want the series to end.

We have so many series and movies available to us through Amazon Prime, Netflix, and many others but I know I will come back to The Durrells again. I urge all of you to watch this heart-warming, funny and amazing family.

This question is a standing joke between my sister and I. Why? Because we don’t know why we talk because nobody listens.

Anything I told someone today is a repeat of yesterday.

If my husband tells me he’s going to the grocery store tomorrow, he will then ask if there’s anything I need. I reply with the one or two items I need. Usually there’s nothing because I stop at the grocery store a couple of times a week. In the event I need something, I tell him what it is. He replies, ‘OK’.

The next morning I’m sitting at my desk and my cellphone rings. My husband calls every morning to say hi and see what’s going on for the day. Before he hangs up, he asks what it is again I wanted from the grocery store. Since he knows he’s got a bad memory, he should have written it down. Why do I talk?

I make appointments for my boss with customers for him to meet. The appointments are documented on the Outlook calendar. If a customer tells me that he needs to ring the side doorbell instead of the front doorbell, I write that in the notes. If the customer tells me that they have dogs and would like to secure them before he arrives, they will ask that he call them when he’s on his way. I write that in the notes. Out of the four to six appointments that he has daily, there is at least one who gives me special instructions that I document in the notes. So this is a regular occurrence.

Before printing out the calendar appointment for my boss, I use the highlight feature for these special instructions so he can see them. Then I print out the appointment, in color, so the bright yellow highlighted notes are visible. He comes back after the appointment and tells me he didn’t know he was to go to the side door or that he was supposed to call while on his way. Why do I talk?

I call my mother 3 times a week to check up on her. During the conversation I may mention that I’m getting my things together for an upcoming trip or I met friends for dinner the night before, etc. Then she asks me why I didn’t tell her this before. I did. I told her this 2 days ago when I called. She denies I did. Why do I talk?

Since I have power of attorney for my mom, her doctor’s office calls once a month with the results of her blood test. She goes monthly for bloodwork because she’s on blood thinners. Each month they call and leave a message on my mother’s machine asking her to call back to get her results. Mom then sends me an email asking me to call the doctor’s office and get the results. Mom doesn’t like talking to the girls from the doctors office because they talk too loud and too fast…even though she used to ask them to talk slower and quieter. Why does she talk?

Anyway, after I get the email from my mom about calling the doctor’s office, I make the call. When I get the gal on the phone with the test results, I mention that they’re supposed to call me with the results and not my mom. The gal always checks the computer and says, “You’re right…sorry about that.” This has been going on each month for over a year and each month my mom gets the call, I get the email, and I tell the doctors office that I’m supposed to be called. Why do I talk?

My granddaughter (age 12 – straight A student since first grade) is standing up in a wedding in May. Her dress was ordered before Christmas and I’ve been asking her almost weekly if the dress came. The answer is always no. Since my granddaughter spends every Tuesday afternoon with me and we have dinner together, this is pretty much a week question about the dress. Yesterday (Tuesday) I asked about the dress again…because it really should have been here by now. She told me it came in a month ago. I asked why she didn’t tell me this a month ago when I’ve been asking every week, if not every other week. “I forgot” she replied. I needed to know this because if the dress needed alterations, I was going to take her in to get this done. Why do I talk?

This goes on every day with almost everyone I know. As a society, are people not listening when others talk? Are there so many other things on our minds that most things people say go in one ear and out the other?

I’ve been told several times that I am the exception to the rule. Anyone who asks me for a recipe, to meet them for breakfast / lunch / dinner at a restaurant, to pick up something from the store, and anything else, I immediately write it down so I don’t forget. If I don’t have paper or pen, I send myself an email from my cellphone. Since I check my emails daily, I will see it.

But it doesn’t stop there. I don’t just scroll thru those email reminders. I take care of each one immediately and then delete it.

This is the same courtesy I want extended to me.

A short, VERY short, eleven months ago we all heard about Coronavirus / Covid 19. If we hunkered down for two weeks, it would all be over. I actually wonder if the entire world stopped for two weeks, would this virus be in our rear view mirror. Unfortunately we will never know.

What are the facts? The numbers are inflated but we don’t know to what degree. Some hospitals are hearing crickets chirp and others are busting at the seams. Unemployment is at a record high but I see Help Wanted signs everywhere I go. Some folks still haven’t seen that first unemployment check. Tons of commercial buildings with For Sale or Lease signs are on the front lawn because so many people are working from home. Malls are filing for bankruptcy protection. Businesses have closed like never before. A second stimulus check never materialized. At times things got better and the ‘rules’ relaxed. Then things got worse and the ‘rules’ were reinforced. The list is endless.

I had Covid in February, it came in two waves four weeks apart, and I didn’t know what Covid was. The rumblings of this virus were in their infancy. All the symptoms were there and to be kind, I will not share everything that my body went through. Everything I did to ‘relieve’ the symptoms of what I thought was bronchitis, only made things worse because at the time what we should or shouldn’t take weren’t known yet. Let’s just say I took EVERYTHING that is now known to be bad for Covid. Only one day I prayed for death because I knew it was going to relieve what I was going through.

Shortly after the second wave hit, I took Prednisone and within three hours I was whistling Dixie! I slept a lot, had plenty of fluids, rested, and got better from there.

This is only my story and I know there’s many more stories out there. I’m still working because I work for an essential business. This year has flown by for me and I’m looking forward to 2021 for several reasons.

First, I believe several vaccines will be available. Second, I’ve got several trips planned for next year with the guarantee of refunds if I need to cancel due to Covid. Third, I simply cannot imagine next year being worse than this year. That doesn’t mean it can’t be…I just cannot imagine it.

This year I saw people being kinder, helpful, and more considerate than ever before. If you’re going through a difficult time in your life and you’re the only one going through it, you can bitch to the high heavens about it. But when the entire world is going through it, it puts things into perspective. There is no ‘Oh Poor Me’ because you’re not alone.

I have a deeper faith this year than ever before and I pray for everyone that the New Year brings hope, love, charity, kindness, health, and happiness. God Bless 2021.

Exactly what is the difference? If you consider yourself blessed, does that mean you have a strong faith and a connection with God? If you consider yourself lucky, does that mean you were born under the right zodiac sign and everything you touch turns to gold?

At some point in everyone’s life something truly great happens to them. It doesn’t have to mean that you chose the winning numbers in the lottery. I’m saying it doesn’t have to be anything about money or material things.

I don’t know if it’s because 2020 really sucked worldwide, but I have been very reflective this year. During all of that reflection, I realized I am truly blessed…and luck had nothing to do with it.

Don’t get me wrong…there have been plenty of really unsettling events in my life, and upon reflection I can truly say they most of them were initiated by me. I’m not proud of that fact but it’s a fact nonetheless.

In recent years I’ve allowed ‘sayings’ to get me through frustrating times. I’ve heard some of them from other people, read some on Facebook, and good old Dr Phil has helped me out with a few also.

One of my favorite by Dr Phil is, “No matter how flat a pancake is, there are two sides.” Let’s face it, most of the time we only hear one side of a story and immediately believe it’s true.

Another one that I use a lot is, “What’s supposed to happen is going to happen.” I LOVE George Strait. Several months ago there was a promotion that if you make a donation to a charity he was supporting, your name would go in a hat. Then a name will be pulled and the winner would have a one-hour happy-hour via Facetime with George. I made a donation and as sure as I’m sitting here I knew I was going to win. Well, I don’t have to tell any of you how that turned out. Instead of pitching a fit about not winning, I simply told myself that if it was supposed to happen, it would have happened. End of story. You can’t win if you don’t play! If I would have won, I would have considered myself blessed AND lucky.

If you think those skeletons in your closet are buried, think again. “The footsteps of the past step on the heels of the future.” At some point something from your past is going to rear it’s ugly head. How you handle it will determine your future.

Did you ever make a decision about something and down the road you had that ‘aha’ moment because it all made sense how things turned out? I don’t think that was luck.

With learning how to handle some of the things life throws your way, maturity comes into play. I’m too old for drama or to care what anyone thinks of me. I spent too many years with drama and pleasing everyone. I cannot get those years back.

So, now back to the topic at hand. Luck or blessings? It wasn’t luck that gave me healthy children and grandchildren. It wasn’t luck that I’ve worked at some great company’s with great co-workers. It wasn’t luck that has provided me with the opportunity to travel to other countries as much as I have. It wasn’t luck that I survived breast cancer.

I have some amazing people in my life and they are in my life by choice. You want people who lift you up, laugh and cry with you, and someone you can call any hour of the day or night. Also people who can make you laugh. If you want to put friendship to the test, don’t call anyone for a month and see who calls you.

The reality of it all is that I am more than blessed and luck had little to nothing to do with how things in my life have turned out. We are all our own gate-keepers and for the most part we can keep anybody and anything out of our lives if we make the right decisions.

As this year draws to a close, the New Year is almost here. Most of us make new years resolutions and very few of us keep them. New Year 2020 I made a resolution and have kept up my resolution about 98%…of which I’m very proud. It’s the first time I’ve ever kept a resolution and I can tell you that I experienced a huge return on it and will keep it going into the New Year!

I am blessed and I ask God to bless 2021….

Four days ago was the 19th ‘anniversary’ of a very horrific day in the history of the United States. While there were many tributes on Facebook and other social media sites, a few folks mentioned September 10, 2001 and September 12, 2001.

Remembering September 10th is quite easy for me. From my perspective this was a relatively safe country. Unbeknownst to any of us, when we got out of bed that morning, it would be the last time for a long time, that we felt happy and secure. People went to work or school, children played outside, folks traveled without hesitation, and every now and then it crossed our minds that we lived in the greatest country in the world. Maybe I’m sugar-coating it a bit…but that is how I would like to remember it.

I woke up on September 11th and went to work. No radios or TVs were allowed in the office so the attacks on our country were in full swing before I heard about it. I remember one of the co-owners of the company coming in the door with panic in her voice. She asked if I had heard about a plane crashing into the World Trade Center. No…I had not. Initially, I just assumed an aircraft hit the first tower due to a medical issue with the pilot.

It didn’t take long to realize that was not the case.

A short while later, the other owners came into the office and were very upset. Early reports were saying terrorist attacks. Being the wonderful employers that they were, they told me if I was scared or upset I could go home…without pay. Being self-supporting didn’t allow for being scared or upset without pay.

We all know what happened during the rest of that day and although it was a very horrific day, the sun did rise the next morning.

Less than 48 hours later, September 12th arrived and folks were glued to their TVs, hoarding groceries, canceling travel plans, and a thousand other things. At this point none of us were quite sure how this was going to end…or if it would ever end. The one thing we were all sure of was that nothing would be the same again and we would have to learn a ‘new normal’.

Some good comes out of every bad situation. A lot of other countries came to our aid, once again some of us learned to appreciate who and what we had in our lives, and to simply take nothing for granted. Maybe some family members who weren’t talking decided to bury the hatchet. There were fund-raisers of every kind for anyone who needed assistance from the fallout of 9/11. We came together and we were united.

Like everything else, all good things must come to an end. Nineteen years after 9/11, we are in the middle of a pandemic, the media is out of control, there is racial tension, police attacks, rioting, burning, and looting. We (the United States) are, in my opinion, the laughing stock of this planet. For a country that used to be thought of as having gold-paved streets, it is suggested that we now de-fund police departments, we have some political candidates that keep the late night talk show hosts cracking jokes, families and friends being torn apart because of political egos, and to be honest, the list is endless.

Our citizens have made a mockery of religion, politics, and the law. We’re out of control and the world knows it. If anyone thinks for one minute that this country is safe and sound and another attack is impossible, think again. We let our guard down almost 20 years ago and now that all this other bullshit is going on, our guard is down again because our attention is directed at trying to curb all the unrest going on.

I will always support the United States of America and will always believe that the American dream is possible. I will always stand for the National Anthem and the Pledge of Allegiance. I do not discuss politics or religion because I was raised to believe those are subjects you do not discuss with other people.

It would never occur to me to speak badly about a candidate running for the presidency or any other political office. It absolutely boggles my mind that people publicly ridicule others for their political beliefs, and not to mention the damage being done to our children and grandchildren who hear adults calling candidates every name under the sun.

There are ways for each of us to handle situations and people we don’t care for. I’m no better than anyone else and Lord knows I have my opinions about the current issues going on in the world and this country, but I speak about them in my own home

Evangelo T. Kasebes. That’s his name. He was born February 12, 1957. The angels came for him on August 9, 1960. He was two-and-a-half years old. At least that’s what his tombstone at Northshore Garden of Memories in North Chicago says. A newspaper article I found says Evangelo was four years old.

I didn’t just stumble upon this. For the last fourteen years, my husband and I take a drive two or three times a year to Northshore Garden of Memories to visit the grave of my husbands brother, Constantine (Butchy). Butchy passed away when he was four years old of leukemia.

From the get-go my husband told me about Evangelo who was laid to rest in close proximity to Butchy. My late father-in-law, Pete, used to tend to both graves while visiting Butchy. Pete would trim the grass, pull the weeds, and if he brought flowers for Butchy, Evangelo got some too.

Why? Because Evangelo came to this country by himself, sponsored by the Waukegan Red Cross, for a life-saving heart surgery that proved fatal. He came from Myrtia, Greece which is located on the island of Crete. His parents did not come with him.

Can you even begin to imagine sending your child to another country for an operation and not going along? Then the surgery is not a success and probably due to lack of funds, his body could not be sent home but must be laid to rest in a foreign country with nobody to watch over him and his grave. That’s where Pete entered the picture.

We knew why Pete tended the grave site. Because that’s the kind of guy Pete was. Until today we did not know how Pete became aware of this situation and took it upon himself to take care of Evangelo’s grave. In the article I found that was published in a Pennsylvania newspaper in August of 1960, it states that Evangelo was the grand-nephew of Anthony C. of North Chicago. Turns out that Anthony was the father of my husband’s uncle’s wife.

For all these years that we’ve been going to the cemetery, we always make a point of trimming and cleaning Butchy’s grave and then we take a few steps to tend to Evangelo’s grave. Each time it just breaks my heart that the mom of The Little Greek Boy never got to say goodbye or hold him one last time. The sleepless nights she must have had when she turned him over to strangers to send to a foreign country to save her sons life…only to never see him again.

For many years I’ve had a fascination with cemeteries and walk through them as often as I can. There is a wealth of information and sometimes a tombstone will bear the picture of the deceased…an opportunity to put a face with their tombstone story. Imagine having the opportunity to talk to someone who died 100 years ago and hear their story…and to answer your questions…and to tell them what life is like today (without mentioning politics or Covid). That would be a dream come true for me.

I don’t care how many protests there are or how many statues are torn down, the history of this country stands as is. It’s our legacy…good or bad. It’s our history…good or bad.

The people represented by those statues fought for what they believed in and what they felt was right. This is no different than any American today.

There is hope that everyone learns from their mistakes. This country was started by the skin of it’s teeth, mistakes were made, wars were won, and wars were lost. Some of those wars didn’t involve weapons.

Let’s start with pride. Remember when you were in high school and the pride you felt for your school and the sports teams? It was pride that brought you to those Friday night football games. Why? Because you thought your school team was the best. There was also cross-country, basketball, baseball, tennis and golf leagues, and more. Those who didn’t participate generally followed their favorite teams out of pride.

Then there was Spirit Week…the week prior to the big Homecoming game and dance. The daily events leading up to the big day were exciting and fun. We showed our pride.

Supporting our country, a citizens right to freedom of speech, and our police departments that do their best for our communities should be shown our support and pride. That doesn’t mean there aren’t a few bad apples and they should be dealt with in a fair and legal manor.

I was raised to respect anyone older than myself, and to never discuss salary, religion or political affiliations with anyone. If I had my way, it would still be that way.

My parents didn’t argue with family or friends about any of these things because you weren’t privy to your neighbors political views. They were entitled to support who they wanted just as my parents did.

We didn’t destroy other peoples property, mouth off to police officers, or talk back to our teachers and clergy. We showed respect. And yes, respect is earned. I can tell you that had we been disrespectful to a neighbor, police officer, teacher, bus driver, mailman, or anyone else we came into contact with, we would have been punished.

If you aren’t loyal to your country, family, or friends, you will fall for anything. We don’t have to like the decisions of our politicians but they must be heard and respected. They were voted for by the majority.

When Donald Trump was running for president, I remember many celebrities and non-celebrities say that if he becomes president, they are going to leave the country. Guess what? They’re all still here. The celebrities have the means to move out of the country but I guess they were just using their celebrity status to sway their fans into voting with them. They do not know loyalty.

Forty plus years ago I worked for a small company and was earning $1.65 per hour. Some of the other employees were disgruntled and decided to get a union shop started. At that point I didn’t know anything about unions.

So I did the next best thing. I asked my elders for their opinions on unions. Only one answer this many years later stands out in my head…’if you don’t like where you work, quit’.

At this point many years later, I still agree with this (my opinion) and suggest that anyone who does not have pride, respect and loyalty for the United States of America should get the fuck out.

You do NOT have to agree with our president or laws or practices but by God, you’re going to have to go along to get along. If you can’t do that, don’t let the door hit you in the ass on the way out.

I love this country. I have pride in this country. I have respect for this country. I am loyal to this country.

God Bless America!

Everybody wears a ‘uniform’ but does it change who you are?

When a nurse or doctor put their scrubs on, it must certainly change who they are and how they feel inside. Those scrubs are their uniform. While wearing scrubs in their workplace – a hospital or clinic – I think it would change who they are in as far as what is expected of them while wearing their ‘uniform’. Those scrubs might tell patients that this person is educated and trained to care for them during a time of need in their life.

How about a construction worker when he / she puts on a hardhat. Does it make them realize that hardhats protect them on the construction site? Does it make them feel a sense of responsibility to be aware of their surroundings to avoid a catastrophe?

Does a lawyer feel more regal and confident while wearing a suit in a court room? That’s his / her uniform. The suit may have the judge and jury looking at them in a different light than if they were wearing jeans. Jeans don’t speak to others like a well-made suit does.

Recently someone asked me if I felt different when I was wearing leather, boots, dew-rags, etc. while riding my motorcycle. Yes it did. I know I walked taller and I felt empowered by this ‘uniform’. There definitely was an attitude while dressed like that.

Last weekend I was wearing an apron while baking. I didn’t think much about it until I went outside to take the wash off the line and cut some lettuce for dinner, all while wearing the apron. It threw me back into a different era. I felt very domestic and satisfied in that ‘uniform’.

The few times I’ve been blessed to wear an evening gown, I also felt different. Those are times where I was at my best because of the event, the gown, and the environment. Two and a half-years ago while dancing with my son for the mother-son wedding dance, I felt like Cinderella with the gown flowing and my son spinning me around the dance floor. This of course is the most elegant of my ‘uniforms’.

So I have to wonder if I’m alone in these feelings. Occasionally does everyone who wears something other than their day-to-day clothes feel a bit more special, elegant, accomplished, and satisfied?

A couple of times in recent years an environment made me feel different also. One of those times was when I was fortunate enough to fly first class. My son purchased a first class ticket for me, and again I felt like Cinderella at the ball. In my wildest dreams I never thought I’d be able to fly first class. That was a new feeling.

In 2015 I went to Greece on vacation. It was an extremely hot and humid August day. Several of us went down to the Ionian Sea, sat in the water to cool off, and spent a couple of hours chatting about this and that. At one moment I realized I was sitting in the sea on the other side of the world looking at colorful rocks and stones and trying to pick out a new color for my bathroom. It was exhilarating…a feeling different than any other feeling I’ve ever had.

How about the first time you get to see and hold your new grandchild? Is there a better feeling than that? I trust that if you ponder (my sister’s new favorite word) on different events and locations in your life, you too just might remember a different feeling within than you do in your day-to-day life.

I do hope everyone experiences this…it just seems to make my life a little bit more special…

In the movie Pretty Woman starring Julia Roberts and Richard Gere, the character Richard plays offers Julia’s character her own apartment, credit cards to all the finest stores in Beverly Hills, and a monthly allowance. Why? To get her off the streets. She turns down the offer saying, “It’s only geography.”

It’s true. She had feelings for Richard’s character and vice versa so getting her off the streets won’t change a thing.

This is exactly what’s going on in the United States today. People can keep rioting, burning buildings, killing policemen as well as innocent bystanders, destroy and loot stores, and blame ALL police officers to justify their actions.

When the rioting, burning, killing, and looting stops, we’re all going to be exactly where we were when it started…only with fewer stores, businesses, and police officers in those neighborhoods. All that aggressive action did nothing but fill up the morning and evening news reports.

It did not improve your neighborhood, police officers feeling like they had targets on their backs quit the force or retired, more tax payer money was required to clean up after these riots, and a lot more fear is spreading in what was once the greatest country on earth.

History NEVER has to repeat itself if we learn something from it. Destroying and purposely removing historical landmarks is NOT going to change history. Those are our reminders of what happened, what probably shouldn’t have happened, and what can we learn from this so we can move forward.

Before you know it, the American flag is going to ‘bother’ someone and it will have to be removed from every public building and home in America. Every little thing that bothers ONE person forces the rest of the citizens of this country to conform to one persons whining.

Schools with mascots bearing Indian names are having to change those names. Land ‘O Lakes butter had to remove the image of an Indian from their packaging. How about the bars on the animal cage on a small box of animal crackers had to be removed because those bars offended some animal-loving group. There are no more winners and losers in childhood sports. Everyone gets a trophy called a participation trophy. We’re raising a bunch if sissies who don’t know how to win or lose gracefully. The list is endless.

We all are entitled to, and allowed to have and express our opinions, but when millions of other Americans are affected by it, it becomes harmful and hateful.

Every person buried in every cemetery in this country is our history. Some were more famous than others. Most were good, hard-working people who wanted nothing more than a better life for themselves. Cemeteries are sacred and protected. Be rest assured, someone is going to be offended by tombstones and those will all have to be removed.

WHO ARE YOU PEOPLE? Get up in the morning, fix your bed, be kind to your neighbors, help those who need it, go to work, pay your bills, have a beer, and enjoy this very short life God has given you. Twenty years from now, 2020 will be nothing but a bad hiccup in our lives.

I’d like to think that each generation wants to make this country a little better than they found it. We’re not going to achieve the greatness America once had by hatred, looting, burning, shooting, and destroying the very history this country was founded on.

Grow the fuck up and smell the roses. And for God’s sake LAUGH!

I saw ‘the chair’ last night and to be honest, I didn’t even recognize it until someone mentioned that it used to be my dads chair.

About five or six years ago, at about the age of ninety, my dad requested a new lift chair that he had seen in a magazine. Dad was living in an assisted living facility and wasn’t sleeping well in his current lift chair as it didn’t recline far enough for a good nights sleep. He couldn’t sleep in his own bed either. This was a lift chair that fully reclined into something similar to a twin-size bed…a little narrower…but when he woke up, all he had to do was push a button to help him get up for the day.

Dad was painfully thin and his bones were ‘seizing-up’ for lack of a better description. He couldn’t stand upright anymore and he was really slowing down. In less than a year after getting ‘the chair’, dad became 100% bed-bound and he didn’t need ‘the chair’ anymore.

However, there was someone who could use ‘the chair’…my mother-in-law. She was in her nineties and the chair she had was uncomfortable. She also was in an assisted living facility. Soon ‘the chair’ was hers and she loved it. It was comfortable and served her needs just fine.

She passed away 2 years ago and I had totally forgotten about ‘the chair’. Until last night.

You see, my brother-in-law is dying from cancer. A couple of weeks ago he moved in with one of his sisters…one that he is quite close to. She wanted to take care of him in his final days. Recently the doctors said he only has weeks to live and I wanted to see him.

I went there last night and as of yesterday morning, he had been moved to a hospital bed. ‘The chair’ was sitting in the next room and I was told that he had been using it since he moved in with his sister.

Next to ‘the chair’ was a sofa and I sat there for a short time looking at the chair. I remembered my dad sitting in it before he passed, my mother-in-law sitting in it before she passed, and now another family member used it until he no longer could.

This chair should not be thought of as anything less than comforting someone when they need it most…and it doesn’t have to be a chair for end of life. It should be thought of as something as comforting as a warm blanket when you’re cold, soup when you’re sick, or the softness of holding a new baby.

It seems that each time we hear of someone under the age of 100 that passed away, someone else pops up and says, “Life is short…live each day like it was your last.”

So…do we really eat the entire chocolate cake, have one last fling, max out our credit cards, tell someone what you’ve really thought of them all these years, and tell your boss to piss up a rope? With very little thought process, any one of us could come up with hundreds of other ‘live-like-it-was-your-last-day’ suggestions.

In all practicality, doing any of these things would probably not end well. Someone, including ourselves, would suffer from the selfishness of these decisions, and there would be hell to pay.

Can you just imagine a world where everyone lived each day like it was their last? It would be absolute chaos.

When you wake up the next day, it just so happens that yesterday was not your last day on earth. Now what? You may be out of a job, in debt, sick from eating too much cake, short a friend or two, and you may have to do some fast talking to your spouse / significant other.

Someone I know is in the final stages of life and under normal conditions, would probably have another twenty to thirty years to live. I’m very sad about this for several reasons…one of which is a secret that only a handful of people know about.

This person is in love with someone and vice versa…and these feelings have been going on for years. They do not act upon this love and cannot be together. Their relationship, by all appearances, is a friendship and I have never seen anything between them except this friendship…but I know the deeper truth.

Since I’m a romantic and look at this flawed world through rose-colored glasses, my heart aches because of this impending death and that these two people cannot ride off into the sunset together…like they could in the movies. They are good, honest, family-oriented, God-fearing people who deserve to be together.

Someday they will…

Karma. A five-letter word that carries a lot of meaning.

Karma is also known as ‘what goes around, comes around’.

I’ve had my karma moments…the receiving end that is. In fact, I still experience karma every now and then…followed by the ‘aha’ moment.

That word is thrown around a lot today. An often-used saying is, ‘Karma is a bitch’. It certainly is if you’re on the receiving end of it. If you’re on the outside looking in, sometimes there’s just a bit more pleasure in it.

I’m sure we’ve all had moments while driving where another driver deserves nothing short of life in prison for tail-gating, driving too slow, not using a turn signal, flashing their lights, honking their horn, etc.

I had my driver’s license for many years when about ten years ago a vehicle behind our group (we were on our motorcycles leaving the Tomahawk Rally in northern Wisconsin), was trying to pass us and was driving erratically. He finally got around us driving much faster than the posted speed limit. About a mile or two down the road, said driver was pulled over and having a conversation with a State Trooper. I cannot believe how good that made me feel. Every now and then that scenario crosses my mind and I wonder what the driver was thinking when he saw our bikes driving by. That was the only time I actually experienced that.

Then there is generational karma. You talked back to your parents when you were a teenager. Then our kids talked back to us. Now our grandchildren are following suit. How many times did your parents say to you, “Wait until you have kids of your own.”

When I was younger…in my twenties and thirties…I actually got angry when I would read or hear about an innocent person getting hurt or tragically killed by another individual. I wanted to hear about swift and immediate justice. Of course that’s not always the case. Now I just smile because I know that individual will get his / her comeuppance…aka karma. It’s inevitable.

A couple I know is going through a trying time right now with the husband’s ex-wife. Since I know both of these women, I know the truth. The ex-wife is spreading malicious and harmful stories about her ex-husband and his new wife. There is a child involved who is being manipulated by the mother to say and do things to keep this situation alive. The child is stuck in the middle and will definitely be harmed by this.

Of course the ex-wife is denying all of it and going so far as to say that it’s someone else doing this. We all know it’s not. As upsetting as it is right now, I know for a fact that the ex-wife is going to experience karma…in one way or another. But it’s of her own doing.

We can all learn something from this. We can think twice before saying or doing something that we think is an ‘I’ll-show-you-moment’ when at some point our friend ‘karma’ is going to intervene.

Then you’ll have your own ‘aha’ moment.

Karma. A five-letter word that carries a lot of meaning.

Karma is also known as ‘what goes around, comes around’.

I’ve had my karma moments…the receiving end that is. In fact, I still experience karma every now and then…followed by the ‘aha’ moment.

That word is thrown around a lot today. An often-used saying is, ‘Karma is a bitch’. It certainly is if you’re on the receiving end of it. If you’re on the outside looking in, sometimes there’s just a bit more pleasure in it.

I’m sure we’ve all had moments while driving where another driver deserves nothing short of life in prison for tail-gating, driving too slow, not using a turn signal, flashing their lights, honking their horn, etc.

I had my driver’s license for many years when about ten years ago a vehicle behind our group (we were on our motorcycles leaving the Tomahawk Rally in northern Wisconsin), was trying to pass us and was driving erratically. He finally got around us driving much faster than the posted speed limit. About a mile or two down the road, said driver was pulled over and having a conversation with a State Trooper. I cannot believe how good that made me feel. Every now and then that scenario crosses my mind and I wonder what the driver was thinking when he saw our bikes driving by. That was the only time I actually experienced that.

Then there is generational karma. You talked back to your parents when you were a teenager. Then our kids talked back to us. Now our grandchildren are following suit. How many times did your parents say to you, “Wait until you have kids of your own.”

When I was younger…in my twenties and thirties…I actually got angry when I would read or hear about an innocent person getting hurt or tragically killed by another individual. I wanted to hear about swift and immediate justice. Of course that’s not always the case. Now I just smile because I know that individual will get his / her comeuppance…aka karma. It’s inevitable.

A couple I know is going through a trying time right now with the husband’s ex-wife. Since I know both of these women, I know the truth. The ex-wife is spreading malicious and harmful stories about her ex-husband and his new wife. There is a child involved who is being manipulated by the mother to say and do things to keep this situation alive. The child is stuck in the middle and will definitely be harmed by this.

Of course the ex-wife is denying all of it and going so far as to say that it’s someone else doing this. We all know it’s not. As upsetting as it is right now, I know for a fact that the ex-wife is going to experience karma…in one way or another. But it’s of her own doing.

We can all learn something from this. We can think twice before saying or doing something that we think is an ‘I’ll-show-you-moment’ when at some point our friend ‘karma’ is going to intervene.

Then you’ll have your own ‘aha’ moment.

‘In the heat of the moment’. We’ve all heard that expression and we know what it means. Currently we’re all in lock-down due to Covid 19. We feel like all of our freedoms and the life we knew have been taken away.

Folks are spouting off on social media about how they’re never going to buy anything made in China ever again. Several posts have shown the rest of us how to distinguish what has been made in China by providing us with the first three digits of the UPC codes indicating it came from China.

About six weeks ago I saw a purse on a site that I really liked. I clicked on the link, read about it, read the non-stop raving reviews and decided to get one. First, I Googled the name of the company offering the purse. I read about them and found that they are located on the west coast. Upon contacting customer service and inquiring if their products are made in the USA or elsewhere, I was told they’re made in the USA.

Convinced and satisfied, I placed the order. Then I waited…and waited…and waited. I received emails telling me when it shipped, when it was due to arrive and so forth. Six weeks later it arrived…with a return address of China. That was last week Friday. I was, and am, livid…and still haven’t opened the package. I put it on the desk and to be honest, I pretend it doesn’t exist.

Did I do enough investigating? Are we all at risk of this when placing online orders? As the headline of this post asks, are we temporarily upset? Emotions are running high these days and some of us are angry. Are we angry at China, our government, or just angry about the whole situation in general?

Is anger the right word? For myself, the word is ‘anxious’. I’m anxious for this to be over, anxious because I don’t have any idea when this will end (my crystal ball is on the fritz)…or if it ever will. I’m hardly inconvenienced by this lock-down and am thankful for that, but there are others whose lives have been turned upside-down personally, professionally, and financially.

We have all experienced other events in our lives that have caused us to dig our heels in and spout off about how we’re going to do things differently moving forward…and that lasts until things return to normal or the outcome of the event is good.

Over the weekend I watched Chernobyl. I know the name Chernobyl and that it was nuclear-related. That’s my vast knowledge on the subject. Chernobyl is a five-part mini-series on finger-pointing for who’s to blame. By the way, I did my homework on this too. I Googled it to find out about it’s accuracy because why waste five hours of my life on something that was created by an educated guess. Several reports said that it was very accurate with a little artistic license.

Long story short, the fallout from Chernobyl will still be around in twenty-thousand years from now. Is that an educated guess or did somebody really, REALLY figure this out? After reading that, I asked myself what the fallout be from Covid 19 and how long with that last?

Thinking that the majority of Americans received a stimulus check to ‘tide us over’ until all of this died down, gave us false hope that it would be over soon. This mornings’ local news said social distancing will continue to take place at least through the summer months.

Now I’m angry.

It seems like a lifetime ago that two words entered our world: Coronavirus and Covid 19. In fact, it’s probably been about two or three months…depending upon who you ask. Much longer than that…depending upon who you ask.

With social media and news reports updating the world on a daily basis, it’s hard to know what the facts are. In my world I can read about the thousands of those infected, the thousands who have died, and what we as the human race can do to avoid it…and I still don’t know of one person who has it, had it, or passed from it. But that doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist.

The information we are receiving from various sources is like standing in line at the grocery store in front of the magazine display. Each magazine headline may be about the same celebrity but they all contradict each other. So who to believe????

Anybody who is anybody are making TV commercials about staying at home. In addition to that, the number of folks putting their ‘stay-at-home’ craft and project ideas on social media are really missing out on an opportunity to appear on Shark Tank. Lots of good ideas out there but since the majority of stores are closed, it will be difficult to purchase some of the items needed for these projects.

So where does the ‘anti-social’ part of this come in? Yesterday on Facebook someone posted this photo:

I read this and the very first thing that popped into my head is that the Coronavirus has not really affected my life except for traveling out of state. I’m still working because my company is considered essential business. I’m still able to buy groceries, purchase products online for home delivery, and take care of my house and yard as I always have.

However, I think anti-social was the wrong term to use in this picture. Why? Because for the first 30 years of my adult life I did not have the means to go out to dinner, out for drinks, to the movies, shopping, and have lunch with the girls without planning weeks in advance to come up with the money. I simply could not afford it. I remember for several years staying home on Thanksgiving and Christmas – ALONE – because I could not afford to waste the gas in my car to accept an invitation to someone’s house for dinner, nor could I afford extra groceries to bring a dish to pass. It was easier to make up excuses not to go. I wasn’t anti-social…I was broke.

The person in this photo appears to live on or near the wide open spaces where they can ride their horse, and with Rover at their side they are content to be alone. I don’t think they’re anti-social…they’re just doing what they enjoy.

I have always enjoyed being home. I feel comfortable and safe there. I have made my house into a home and am pleased with how it turned out. Planting flowers and vegetables makes me happy and there’s nothing like the smell of the dirt while planting. Except for how wonderful the laundry smells after hanging on the line all day. My home is my comfort zone but I don’t feel I’m anti-social. If I have to choose to go out on a weeknight or stay home, I choose home. Besides, I’m in bed by 8pm because I get up at 430am to go to work.

After this pandemic is over and with the probable restrictions in place for a while, I think more than a few people are going to find that they actually enjoyed being home, either alone or with their family.

You know what? There’s no place like home!